Postpartum Anxiety: Why Rest and Prayer Aren’t Always Enough
There I was.
It was 2 a.m., and I was sobbing on the couch watching Grey’s Anatomy, asking God why my baby wouldn’t sleep. My husband was in the nursery with our crying three-month-old, and I thought turning on the TV would distract me from the sound of his cries.
Instead, I cried harder.
I cried because he wouldn’t stop crying.
I cried because I felt helpless.
And then I cried because I wondered if this was more than my husband had bargained for.
Sound familiar?
Have you ever had a moment like that- where everything feels like it’s piling up into one dramatic “I can’t do this anymore” moment?
If so, I want you to hear this clearly: you are not alone.
Why Postpartum Anxiety Can Feel So Confusing
So many moms quietly carry shame around thoughts like:
Am I even cut out for this?
This baby is an answered prayer- so why am I feeling this way?
And yet, these thoughts are far more common than we talk about.
During pregnancy, we hear things like “you’ll never sleep again” or “don’t worry, it gets better.” We assume we’ll be tired- but okay. At least, pregnant-me definitely thought so.
What no one really prepares you for is what’s happening inside your body after the baby arrives.
What’s Actually Happening in Your Nervous System After Baby
Here’s what’s actually going on.
When you have a baby, your nervous system shifts into high alert. This is biological and protective — your body is wired to stay vigilant so no danger comes near your baby. When your baby cries, your entire system kicks into “go mode.” Your brain and body are instantly ready to respond, fix, protect.
The problem is that your nervous system doesn’t always know the difference between true danger and normal baby needs- like a poopy diaper, gas, or just wanting to be held. And when it doesn’t get a chance to power back down, it can stay stuck in that high-alert state.
Over time, this can show up as:
anxiety that feels like it comes out of nowhere
constant decision fatigue
numbness or emotional disconnection
mood swings
low libido
a lingering sense of being “on edge”
Why Rest and Prayer Don’t Always Calm Anxiety Right Away
And if you’re also feeling distant from God, wondering why prayer doesn’t seem to calm your body the way you hoped- please keep reading.
Faith reminds us that we are held, supported, and not alone.
But when the nervous system is in fight-or-flight, the body has a hard time responding to logic alone- even spiritual truth.
It’s kind of like praying for a job but never filling out the application.
God designed us with both a soul and a body. They are meant to work together. When we care for the nervous system He gave us, we are not failing spiritually- we are honoring how intricately we were created.
A Simple Pause to Help You Regulate in the Moment
So the next time you feel the tightness in your chest…
the lump in your throat as you hold back tears that feel “silly”…
or that surge of emotion that makes you want to scream or throw something…
I want to offer you a simple pause.
First, let me say this gently and clearly: your baby is safe for a brief moment in a safe place while you take two minutes to care for yourself. You are not doing harm by tending to your body. I give you permission.
Place one hand on your heart and simply notice where you feel the emotion. Is it in your chest? Your throat? Your belly? There is nothing to fix right now, just notice.
Then, quietly or out loud, say:
“I am safe.
I am not in danger.
My baby is safe.
God, I know You are with me in this moment. I need You.”
Take one deep breath, so full you feel your ribs expand and then let out a long, audible exhale.
This pause helps bring your rational brain back online so you can respond, not react.
For me, this practice changed everything. I used to ask my husband if he still loved me every time I had a meltdown (yes, really). Over time, slowing my body first helped me move forward with clarity instead of being carried by emotion.
You can do this too.
You Don’t Have to Navigate This Alone
Motherhood was never meant to be done alone and neither was the emotional weight that comes with it. You are valuable, you are called to the sacred work of raising the specific child God entrusted to you, and support is not a sign of weakness.
This is the kind of work I offer to prenatal and postpartum moms- helping them feel steady, grounded, and supported during one of the biggest transitions of their lives.
If this resonated with you, you don’t have to carry it by yourself.
I’m here.